Week Five

Time marches on during treatment. We had friday off for Good Friday and it seemed weird not going in. Tomorrow Robbie's daycare is closed so Sean is taking the day off so I dont miss a day.

Sister C, at church, keeps asking me if I am enjoying the program. Therapy is not something that can be enjoyed. It is a lot of hard work that is emotionally and mentally draining. I come home and am exhausted, even on days when I do not share much.

This past wednesday was my patient evaluation. I told everyone why I am in therapy and they gave me suggestions to work on. The one area that I disagreed with is my marriage. Things with Sean are going great, we talk about the things we need to and dont tend to leave things to fester. We rarely argue let alone fight. No, I am not denying any issues. The one thing that works in my life is my marriage. It was also suggested that I work with my issues of loss (already started that one) and my issues surrounding parenting of Robbie. I was also told to speak up more in Large group and to show my emotions more. I would show my emotions if I could, the old medication is still lingering and I am still having issues with crying - I want to cry but I cant.

I tired calling Grace but there was no answer. I feel very alone on the holidays, yes I have my own little family but I miss the large family get togethers. Maybe that is something to talk about tomorrow....

Well Extreme Makeover, Home Edition is almost finished taping and it is a two-hour episode tonight. Must go for now.